a Matter of Choice

            As the money floated from Kelly’s pocket to the blackjack table, it never even occurred to her as to what she had put at risk during her latest trip to the Casino. Kelly continued to look forward to the next big payoff and with the dealer showing a six of hearts verses her pair of aces, it seemed splitting the ace’s was the only logical course of action to the thirty-nine year old gambling addict that seemed to of finally had a change of luck. The mixture in the kaleidoscope of sound and lights the filled the casino from every angle seemed to slowly fade into the background as small beads of sweat seemed to form from every visible pore and a few that weren’t visible to the bystanders eye as Kelly suddenly calculated that she had gone over her assigned budget this trip. Originally Kelly had planned on only spending two-hundred this time into the casino, but that plan had suddenly gone away when the pair of aces faced the dealers  six on Kelly’s last hand before she reached her time limit to leave. Kelly had reached into her pocket and broke her own rules that her councilor and she had settled on to curb this self destructive habit known to the world as uncontrolled gambling.

                Basic blackjack strategy had just gone out the window when the chance to split the aces against the dealers six for Kelly. Without thinking Kelly had pulled her rent money from its separate envelope to cover the cost of the new bet; instead of pulling her money from the table and walking away ahead finally the chance to cover at least some of her recent losing trips into the casino. Watching the dealer change over her bills into chips and replace them in front of her, Kelly grabbed the pile and separated it into the need amount to show the dealer she wanted to split her hand. A loud siren had just gone off somewhere out of sight amongst the many rows of slot machines that lined the edge of the casino, like the finely arranged bricks that formed the foundation of a middle school.

                “Kelly, you know better; what are you doing?” the feminine voice had so suddenly came from her left, it had startled her enough to jump slightly to the right side of her chair, which caused her to glance towards the still unseen voice more in anticipation then startlement. What Kelly saw in the chair next to her drew her attention so wholly that she forgot for a split second where she was at. To her it seemed she was staring in the mirror at her bedside vanity, late at night alone in her bedroom, only she was in a crowded casino instead with a hundred plus people shuffling around like ants in a colony each with their own distinct plans towards accomplishing their individual goals.

                “Excuse, me?” stuttered a startled now visibly tremoring  Kelly as she remembered where she was at and glanced at the cards on the table and the dealer as he continued on with the hand and started it with the player to her far right at first base.

                “Hey watch it there you damn jumping bean, I’m sitting right here,” a closer feminine voice sitting directly to her right where a second ago it was empty. Kelly would only play black jack if the chairs next to her were empty, part of a silly superstition, but it helped Kelly get through her fear of crowds while feeding her addiction to gambling. She hadn’t expected someone to intrude on her personal space so quietly and so suddenly without her noticing at least some kind of movement.

                Glancing to her right the pure shock of seeing her reflection sitting next to her snapped her back into reality for a second. “Madam?” this male voice came from in front of her. It was the dealer, “Maam, are you ok?” he asked with more question then concern.

                “Ah, yes. I’m fine.” She responded with uncertainty, glancing from her left then to her right slowly and shaking as she saw what appeared to be two exact replicas of herself. The one on her right had a very mischievous grin and the one on her left had a slight frown on her face as she glanced back at Kelly with a look of pure concern laced with an edge of pity. Looking back down at her cards, Kelly could see that the dealer had split her aces and placed the stack of two hundred dollars in chips behind each ace. Pulling his hand back to the shoe the dealer brought out a card and flipped over a seven of clubs to place on the first ace.

                Before Kelly could brush her curly shoulder length reddish brown hair from in front of her eyes, the first replica to her left spoke up “Kelly, what are you doing dear? You just bet your rent money for this month on just one hand! Where are you gonna live after your landlord evicts you; cause you lost the rent money again?”

                “I can’t lose this time the dealer has to hit that six, my luck is finally changing”, whispered Kelly, more to her left then anyone.  Glancing down at the lone ace next to the ace with the seven sitting across it in the shape of a tee, Kelly began to think again about the possibilities of making up her losses here then leaving after this last hand.

The dealer seeing her speak but not quite hearing her leaned forward and said “Excuse me, I’m sorry you need to motion hit or stay, maam.”

“Uh, yea. I’m sorry hit me” making a sweeping motion towards herself with her right hand. The dealer understanding her sign flipped over the next card onto the seven to show a two for a total of twenty. “Now that’s better” mumbled Kelly making the standard stand motion, as she looked to her left with a cocky smirk at the replica to her left, but to no avail because the replica was no longer there only an empty chair. Looking quickly around she noticed the replica to her right was still there and in response to her puzzled look of confusion, the replica to her right simply shrugged its shoulders as if to say don’t look at me I don’t know.

“Maam, is there something wrong,” it was the dealer again talking to her in a little louder voice this time.

Looking forward at the dealer and down at her hands again she noticed that the dealer had flipped over the next card for her hand, it was an eight of diamonds for a total of nineteen.  As a she realized what had just happened and without so much as thinking her hand made the standard stand motion. Unconsciously Kelly looked towards her right and accepted the tissue from the replica on her right to wipe the small beads of sweat that started to form on her forehead. The replica appeared as if to say something then decided better against it and simply sat and waited for Kelly’s next move. “What?” Kelly slightly snickered in a mockingly arrogant voice as she looked back at the replica.

“Don’t look at me, I wouldn’t of even stayed here when I started to lose past my loss limit” the replica smiled back at her, “besides dear Kelly the odds may be in your favor this time but testing fate too much has a way of biting you hard in the long run.”

The dealer spoke up and said “Ok here we go, let us see what we have.” Grabbing his six he used it to flip over his down card, this caused a seven to come into view for a total of thirteen.  The dealer having to draw till a hard seventeen is met reached for the next card in the deck flipping it over, a three of clubs landed next to the seven on the dealers pile. Looking nervously towards her right at the replica Kelly noticed that she was now sitting alone but for one other person sitting to her far right because the replica was know where in sight.  Glancing back down at the dealers hand he drew the next card in the shoe, showing a two of spades for a total of nineteen.

 The dealer quickly paid off her hand of twenty and gave the sign of a push for her hand of nineteen, removing the cards from in front of the two players at the table. Kelly collected her two hundred dollars winnings in chips, pulling back everything in front of her.  Gathering her chips in her hand to place them on the betting square a harsh voice could be heard in her head.  Don’t test me again; I won’t be so nice next time.  Startled Kelly gathered her chips and left without further need of urging.